Birthdays come and go

Birthdays come and go

And your age will go too

But your good heart moves on

I’ve seen you become a better person

Birthdays come and go

But your humor continues to flow

You make me laugh everyday

Even though some days are gray

Birthdays come and go

But forever you will be mine

Growing old with you

We’ll be like fine wine

Birthdays come and go

But my love for you is so

So strong and long-lasting

With you, I feel amazing

Birthdays come and go

For every candle you blow

To God I’m going to pray

That our love will always stay

Birthdays come and go

All I am I give to you

Thanks for coming to my life

I will love you till afterlife

Happy birthday, my love!

You’re a blessing from above!

I.W.A.L.Y.

In my cluttered life you came

With your sincere heart you captured me

I was lost in your eyes, your lips, your touch

Lost in your spectacular love

Love that is breathtaking

A love that I’m willing to give in everything

Love that only you could give.

With all of me, I adore you

And all that I am, I surrender to you

Your love is overwhelming

So stunning I’m still in awe everyday.

Lovely memories we have created

On half a decade with you

Vibrant life, your love radiates to me

Enthralled by your presence

You’re the only man I have loved like this

On days and nights with you

Unparalleled love is what I always feel.

WHEN WE GIVE, WE ALWAYS RECEIVE

Buddha said: If you light a lamp for someone else it will also brighten your path. Why are you here on this earth? What is your purpose? What are you supposed to be doing with your life? These deep questions burn in all of us. Our souls’ desire is to lead fulfilling lives that have meaning.

My life’s journey has always been linked to helping other people – taking care of my siblings and my grandmother, doing chores with my mother, lending things to my friends, backing their excuses to their parents, and so much more. Yes, I always wanted to help people, especially those who are in need. However, it was much later when I learned that serving other people not only changes their lives but also yours.

Yet things were not really easy at first. People always needed my help and I will help them because I needed approval and recognition for the things I did for them and not about the difference I could make.

We would often be so angry with ourselves for doing things for other people that we really didn’t want to do. We cannot say no when we really wanted to because we were seeking approval and wanting to be liked. But we must realize when we could say no.

For me, I knew that I’d been saying no to the wrong person and what I needed was to start saying yes to myself.

I also needed and wanted to be sure that I wasn’t being mean and hurtful to others by saying no to certain requests, and so I started asking them. And when I did this, I was surprised that most of the people I know were not mad at me for not responding to their requests. And I realized quickly that the people who truly love us are the ones who would tell us what we need to hear, not what we want to hear.

And I wanted more of that in my life, and I knew if I were open and honest with others in this same way, I would help them discover something great about themselves and also for myself. And this was true servitude – serving others is not about seeking recognition for you, because it is more than recognition – it is fulfillment. The more you give to yourself, the more you are able to give to others, and the more you then receive.

When I joined an advocacy organization, The Hope Project, I discovered more about myself and helped more people. I was able to listen and be present to more people, give them respect, and appreciate them for who they were. I started to gain insights into many different lives and get to know each person I was helping. This servitude was giving me fulfillment and meaning and it made better changes in my life. The sense of fulfillment I was feeling showed me I was living my life on purpose.

Every encounter with pediatric cancer patients is always a sad feeling at first because you will see these kids, so young and so eager to experience the beautiful world but here they are – battling cancer. Even though some kids have IVs inserted in them, they would still try to play because it’s a rare moment that they get a chance to interact with other people. But after every visit, it’s always rewarding to see them smile because of what you did and for a moment, it would seem that they forgot about their illness and they are just thinking about what will be the next game or what color would they use in their drawing.

Every experience with these kids always teaches me a new lesson. And it’s really true that when we give, we always receive. I receive happiness and gratefulness every time I interact with them. 

But before we could help other people and lead fulfilling lives, we must first be aware of who we are and how beautiful and great we are.

We come into this world with infinite potential and then become conditioned to live to society’s expectations. This is the way it is, and yet we have the potential to change it. We can have such doubt about ourselves. Yes, society may limit our potential, but these are only self-imposed doubts. Remind yourself that you can choose self-doubt or self-belief. And when we believe in ourselves, we show up differently in the world. Our level of self-belief allows us to know that everything will be okay, no matter what happens, and that we can extend this attitude to other people which in turn, can change their life.

Serving other people is easy when we know who we are and what we are about. Because how will you help other people if you are falling apart? And I believe that our true purpose in life is to give our lives away to others, and in that way, we receive happiness, fulfillment, and meaning in return.

Dear Iana

I’m just going to be honest and tell you that this is a love letter. I know it’s a little awkward and probably slightly weird, but I know you are worthy of this. You are loved and you need to know why.

I love you because you are caring, sympathetic, thoughtful, and compassionate. You see people in need and wonder what you can do to help or how you can make their days a little bit easier. I mean, you even joined an organization for this! I love that you are full of love and that you seriously want everyone to be happy.

But I also love you because you aren’t scared to take some time for yourself. You understand how appreciated and important you are, and that you can’t help someone else if you are falling apart. When you’re nearing your edge you eagerly step back. You know how to say no, to relax, and to put yourself first. I love that some of your favorite “me time” activities include taking a very loooooong bath, watching romcom movies especially A Lot like Love, When Harry Met Sally, and Before Sunrise trilogy, and making poems about anything you want.

I love you because you could have chosen any other career field, one that is easier and doesn’t exceed over 6 years, but you knew where your heart was, and you followed it. I love you because you are clever, strong-minded, inspired, and determined. You take the time to decide on what you want, and then you go for it.

I love you because you love to be silly and know how to have fun. Remember the times when you made a fort with your little piglets in your bed for no other reason than because you wanted to? That was amazing. And I love that you randomly make little animal noises and that you don’t think it’s weird to play with Hotwheels at your age.

I love you because you had your heart broken and you took the time to put the pieces back together. When you were ready, you put yourself out there again and I know that took huge amounts of courage. But look at what you have now! You found Cesar – the man who treats you better than you could have ever imagined and you two are still so very in love with each other even after 3 years.

I love you because you know what makes you happy and you surround yourself with it. Indie music, pizzas, pastas, cheeseburgers, Sprite, friends and families who love to laugh, romcom movies, and traveling. I love that you listen to Jason Mraz when you’re in writing mode, that almost every possession of yours are colored green, and that you aren’t anxious to paint your nails with rainbow colors.

I love you because you aren’t petrified of adventure. You aren’t terrified to take risks, try something new, and you have huge amounts of faith in yourself that you won’t fail. And if you do, you know that you’ll be making it through.

I love you because you don’t let yourself be sad. You will just sit with it, let yourself think of the brighter side of things, and eventually feel more positive. You are still learning how to be less irritated, but that’s okay. You immediately get quiet and just certainly don’t like to talk about it. Sometimes you let a hateful comment slip out, but you now feel horrible the second it hits the floor. You are starting to be more conscious of your words, learning to fill them with kindness, rather than hurt. You are learning and I am proud of you for that.

I love your straight short hair which you don’t comb, your dark brown eyes with your never-been-plucked eyebrows. I love your own version of curved waist and sexy hips. I love your soft skin for you never forget to put lotion on it every day, the super tiny moles in your face, and your small fingers and feet. I love your little nose, your cheeks that get rosy every time you feel hot and your little lips. I love that you are learning to speak gentle, encouraging words to yourself.

I love that you are unraveling yourself, on a journey to find your center, that part of you that is the truest version of you. I love that you are taking the time to learn more about yourself, that you recognize the significance of it and that you are so brave to face it head-on. But most of all, I love you for loving yourself.

Yours forever,Iana

Letter to my five year old self

Dear Five Year Old Iana,

There are so many things that I want you to understand. However, I know it would bore you if I will make a super long list so I’ll keep it short and focus on the most important parts.

First, your mom and dad love you no matter how it looks or how they will make you feel.  You’re lucky to have both parents who openly love you, give loads of hugs, kisses, support, and praise you. You can always easily count on them every time you need someone to lean to. So, make them proud!

Second, no matter what other people tell you with words or actions please know that you are smart. You will become a doctor (just like you've always wanted!) and go on to take care of the sick. You will be the best doctor in the country for you always had the heart to help people.  Just know that your brain is a good one, too.

However, please don't be in a hurry to stop playing with your toys. Yes, the things in your cabinet that Mama always put back, play all of it. You have the rest of your life to read Candy Mag or Total Girl, so don’t start now.  Go play, imagine, and create. Just be a kid!

Third, be nice to your sister Tintin (and to your two brothers that will come). Yes, she will be annoying you for a long time, or may be forever.  But you will grow up and realize she is actually going to be the best friend you’ll ever have. You will be glad to be close to her and to share stories with her every day in your bedroom. She will always be the first one who will know your problems and will always be the first shoulder you can cry on. I know you don’t believe me but it’s true.  Even though you are going to yell and scream at each other a lot, Tintin will always be there for you and I know you will always be there for her too.

Lastly but most importantly, you are free. You are free to choose the life that you want to live. You have the whole world before you and the love and support of your family behind you. All you have to do is trust yourself and don’t be afraid. You’re a young, smart, and beautiful girl who can reach her dreams. Just always stay true to yourself and tune into Jesus. I know you don’t know much about Him yet, but I know one day you will really know Him.  He is going to meet you when you least suspect it and most need it, and He will keep you going from then on.  You'll see.

I think that is all for now.  Learn a lot and always follow your heart. Maybe try a new sport (yes, I know you won’t take my advice on this one, but I had to try).

Love,19 Year Old Iana