WHEN WE GIVE, WE ALWAYS RECEIVE

Buddha said: If you light a lamp for someone else it will also brighten your path. Why are you here on this earth? What is your purpose? What are you supposed to be doing with your life? These deep questions burn in all of us. Our souls’ desire is to lead fulfilling lives that have meaning.

My life’s journey has always been linked to helping other people – taking care of my siblings and my grandmother, doing chores with my mother, lending things to my friends, backing their excuses to their parents, and so much more. Yes, I always wanted to help people, especially those who are in need. However, it was much later when I learned that serving other people not only changes their lives but also yours.

Yet things were not really easy at first. People always needed my help and I will help them because I needed approval and recognition for the things I did for them and not about the difference I could make.

We would often be so angry with ourselves for doing things for other people that we really didn’t want to do. We cannot say no when we really wanted to because we were seeking approval and wanting to be liked. But we must realize when we could say no.

For me, I knew that I’d been saying no to the wrong person and what I needed was to start saying yes to myself.

I also needed and wanted to be sure that I wasn’t being mean and hurtful to others by saying no to certain requests, and so I started asking them. And when I did this, I was surprised that most of the people I know were not mad at me for not responding to their requests. And I realized quickly that the people who truly love us are the ones who would tell us what we need to hear, not what we want to hear.

And I wanted more of that in my life, and I knew if I were open and honest with others in this same way, I would help them discover something great about themselves and also for myself. And this was true servitude – serving others is not about seeking recognition for you, because it is more than recognition – it is fulfillment. The more you give to yourself, the more you are able to give to others, and the more you then receive.

When I joined an advocacy organization, The Hope Project, I discovered more about myself and helped more people. I was able to listen and be present to more people, give them respect, and appreciate them for who they were. I started to gain insights into many different lives and get to know each person I was helping. This servitude was giving me fulfillment and meaning and it made better changes in my life. The sense of fulfillment I was feeling showed me I was living my life on purpose.

Every encounter with pediatric cancer patients is always a sad feeling at first because you will see these kids, so young and so eager to experience the beautiful world but here they are – battling cancer. Even though some kids have IVs inserted in them, they would still try to play because it’s a rare moment that they get a chance to interact with other people. But after every visit, it’s always rewarding to see them smile because of what you did and for a moment, it would seem that they forgot about their illness and they are just thinking about what will be the next game or what color would they use in their drawing.

Every experience with these kids always teaches me a new lesson. And it’s really true that when we give, we always receive. I receive happiness and gratefulness every time I interact with them. 

But before we could help other people and lead fulfilling lives, we must first be aware of who we are and how beautiful and great we are.

We come into this world with infinite potential and then become conditioned to live to society’s expectations. This is the way it is, and yet we have the potential to change it. We can have such doubt about ourselves. Yes, society may limit our potential, but these are only self-imposed doubts. Remind yourself that you can choose self-doubt or self-belief. And when we believe in ourselves, we show up differently in the world. Our level of self-belief allows us to know that everything will be okay, no matter what happens, and that we can extend this attitude to other people which in turn, can change their life.

Serving other people is easy when we know who we are and what we are about. Because how will you help other people if you are falling apart? And I believe that our true purpose in life is to give our lives away to others, and in that way, we receive happiness, fulfillment, and meaning in return.